Freeloading Phill and ...

... Mistaken Identity

In an incident that would make Days of our Libraries happy I was mistaken for Polish Chris at a council coworkers farewell lunch this afternoon - probably further proof in Days eyes that I must have a bit of the Polish look about me.

The confusion was quickly sorted out only to descend again on me as I was thanked for fixing of computers that I couldn't remember doing. It turns out that I was now being mistaken for Imposter Phil and had to refer to myself as "Library Phill" to reclaim my identity.

All that mistreatment and the lunch wasn't even free!!

... The Sounds of the Past

I spent a long night last night with Agent Smith converting cassettes of some of the bands I'd been in during the mid to late nineties.

The day began with me gathering together the various tape recordings of bands I had in my collection. After loading them into my trusty excursion bag I visited Fridgepower and Judge Mingus to take advantage of Fridgepower's superior archiving abilities and secure a further bounty of recordings.

I arrived at Agent Smith's just in time for dinner and a lovely drop of 1998 vintage Durif.

Eventually we got to work and, after many arguments over the inclusion of banter, I was able to stuff my excursion pack full of CD versions of recordings by Malaclypse III, Saturnalia, Def Dumb & Blonde, and Dreamcraft.

Heading home I gratefully dropped into bed to try to claim as much sleep as I could after the 3am finish.

... Flibberty's Farewell

After a leisurely afternoon meeting with The Professor and Madame President to discuss SPUN Executive things I toodled off to The Flibberty Gibbet's farewell drinks as she is leaving the LMS supplier for more academic pastures.

The chosen venue was The Mint. It was a great night for some outdoor drinks and the beergarden BBQ proved just what I needed to lay the foundations for what was to come.

Several large beers later I'd had some good conversations with some of the girls who deal with my pleas for help when the system breaks.
I was also been able to dig for dirt on Mr Prada from The Puppies who knows him quite well so I should be able to maintain my command of him for quite some time now.

Somehow TFG, a generous barrister, a help desker and I walked into a bar... no wait that's not right, we staggered our way to a new venue which turned out to be the Carriage place, from the staff Christmas party, in which it appears I am fated to spend all my late drunken evenings.

I had to leave once the progressive 80's rock instrumental band started as it was just all too much to bear.


Hell Island by Matthew Reilly

There really is nothing like a little train time to help you knock off a few quick books. This is the first Reilly book (action movie script) I've read for a while and the break as done wonders for my appreciation of his writing style. I quite enjoyed the setting and the story. It's shortness made it a great two-day read. If you like his stuff then this is one of the better Scarecrow stories.

... (Boolean Training) AND (Being Dead)

I spent the day in the city today learning all about how to coax information out of the LMS using it's boolean query function.

The lunch was quite good and I think I've learned a few things that will help with statistic extraction and catalogue cleanup - and most excitedly how to track down the stupid typos in email and fix them before they cause bounced notices...

...well it's exciting for me and possibly Mr Prada too since we have to deal with the bounces.


After the training I popped into the fancy-pants shop where Rugrat Twin works to have our first face-to-face catch up since my return from the continent.



Several days in a row of "I'm On The Train" have led to me quickly finishing Being Dead by Jim Crace. It was recommended, nay foisted upon, me by Badger and turned out to be an interesting story about the lives of a middle-aged couple and their last few days after death. Not for the squeamish and I am puzzled that The Observer can call it "An extraordinarily moving love story" since to me it seemed to be leaning more in the other direction.


Meanwhile on the gaming front, I had an almost full house last night for the start of the Tuesday night Judge Dredd story with all the regulars who weren't on honeymoons making it and Pirate Dave making his first appearance for his three month run. So many players I didn't know what to do with them but in the end they gave my improvisational skills a good workout.


Oh and here's a bonus wedding picture of Brotherstealer and the Legion - with yours truly rightfully centrally framed.

... Un Lun Dun by China Mieville

I finished reading this on the train on the way into work this morning.

It's a great younger readers book by one of my favourite authors.

It has his usual level of inventiveness and wordplay and I highly recommend it.

If any of you haven't read his other books I think you should rush to your nearest library and immediately borrow a copy of Perdido Street Station before I have to publicly shame you.

... The Wedding of Legion2 and The BrotherStealer

Yesterday was finally the big day where the BrotherStealer got her way and was wed to Legion2.

It was quite a hot day to be dressed as a penguin but thankfully the ceremony wasn't until early evening and it was outside with an evening breeze. Positioning for the ceremony could have been better with those in the party not getting married having to squint into the sun to see any of the action.

The only real pre-ceremony drama was removing the fur of The Tiger which while apparently impossible to vacuum out of the car comes off quite easily with the application of fancy clothes.

During the ceremony I had a moment of mild concern when the brides ring hid itself in the far corner of my pocket to avoid detection when I went to retrieve it as part of my starring role.

Photo taking time, although short, kept me from getting to the free predinner drinks for a while.

The venue was the right size for the hundred or so people with the outdoor decking with city views proving quite popular throughout the night.

Dinner was a lovely entree of duck followed by fish or something else which I didn't take note of as I was busy eating and being slightly nervous about my upcoming best man's speech.

A last minute switching of speech order saw me going first without the benefit of any father of the bride warm up. But of course it didn't matter - I killed them. Proving once again the value of a little practice and fine tuning. It was interesting though to see which parts proved most popular and which parts were only mildly entertaining to the audience.

Post speech saw me finally able to take advantage of the remaining food and booze before indulging in some serious dance floor antics at the behest of BestFriendSincePrep and Mrs StumpyRudolph. I think I've come away from the evening with a mild case of Khe Sanh circle shoulder.

All in all it was a good night - many of the usual suspects were present plus Handy Dad's very own Legion; Freeloading Mum sported an eraserhead-esque haircut; I had my first meeting with the spawn of Sir Clive Pitbull and also the spawn of Mr Magpie (no relation); BestFriendSincePrep failed to ply me with drinks so I was human today.


Speaking of today there was a free lunch organised for the official gloating over the loot - which was quite extensive. Most unusual present goes to the electric vegetable peeler.

Post lunch I headed over to once again fix Freeloading Mum's home computer and scored a free dinner for my troubles.


Tonight, after a short blackout delayed my scribing of the tales, I have been sweltering in the flat as we begin this run into a hot spell. I may have to press the air-conditioner into action tomorrow night as I've heard they are supposed to be good for dealing with heat issues.

... The Making of a Speech

I meant to post an entry yesterday but all my spare computer time has been filled with the hand-carving of my best-man speech for Legion2's wedding reception on Saturday night.
It's coming along swimmingly and, in fact, the big danger may be running over my 7-8 minute limit by 10 minutes or so.

Said hand-carving has been taking place in Google Docs which means I can say:
(246 Alternate Title: Thing #18 Web-based Apps)
and knock off another one of the 23 things (which I need to do now that 2.1 is here and there are another 23 things).
Google Docs works quite well for traveling from place to place without the need for saving files to disk or M$ Office. It's "lack" of advanced formating tools actually makes it much more productive and the absence of Petey Paperclip is it's apotheosis.


Other things keeping me busy have included such great fun as:
  • spending many days setting up new PCs at Beaumaris branch with no help from Imposter Phil or Polish Chris at council IT since they are snowed under after CC's recent departure - apparently with all the knowledge of how IT things work
  • making the mistake of visiting Brighton branch and walking away seven new jobs for the worse
  • adding more Ding to our circulation PCs. A little investigation uncovered the sound file used for nigh-inaudible alerts by our LMS and it's swift change will now go on to annoy staff no end whilst ensuring they no longer miss alerts
  • having to listen to unprovoked insults from the new children's librarian - "this food is for the Summer Reading Club party this afternoon and you are not to eat it Phill" and Days of our Libraries - "please tick which meal options you want on training day - and you can't tick all of them Phill". One suspects Torchwood's hand is behind it all.

Prior to coming home tonight Legions2-4 and I collected our penguin costumes for Saturday night in a scheduling move maliciously designed to deny me my soccer game. Of course finding out that Legion3 was in the end able to make the 4.30 time which would have allowed me to go on to kick the round ball did wonders for my extreme sense of lose.

... The Gaming Buck's Night of Legion2

Before I get into the main event I have to mention that I scored another goal at soccer on Thursday night. Well, my team mate basically bounced his pass off me into the goal but I'm claiming it since I ran to be in good position. I'm now at 8 goals in 16 months so expect the next goal report on April 10th.


The Main Event

This Saturday we had the second Buck's Night event to celebrate Legion2's upcoming nuptials.

In the grand tradition of the Buck's Nights of Gavman, ArchEnemy, and ElfBoy it was an afternoon and evening of gaming.

The afternoon was a fast-play version of one of our card tournaments with Legion2, Mr Magpie (no relation), Gavman, MatrixMan, Elfboy, and myself taking part.
Mr Magpie (no relation) romped in unbeaten. The fast-play kind-of worked except for the highlight grudge-game between Legion2 and yours truly which went for an hour and a half in a huge stalemate and - in younger brother tantrum style - included Legion2 having a fit of table punching over an insignificant mistake when the game was fairly obviously going to be won by him in the next few minutes anyway.

With the addition of ArchEnemy, BestFriendSincePrep and Badger we switched to a movie trivia game whilst the footy was on tv in the background. Surprisingly few of the answers were Red Dawn.
Ooh I just though of a Caution (about time I had another one): Alcohol does not a quick trivia game make. Even if you do play in teams.
When asked something along the lines of "Who starred in the 1994 film xxx?" a slightly affected BestFriendSincePrep responded with "Is this a true or false question?"

Disgusted with the pies display of football Mr Magpie (no relation) left shortly after the end of trivia and ArchEnemy joined him.

We remaining seven began our final game of the evening - a seven knight game of Shadows Over Camelot. By a quirk of fate Legion2 was the secret traitor, although MatrixMan's beginner status and inebriation made his clumsy play seem quite suspicious. At the end of that game most of the evenings attendees departed.

Since it was still early - and to stay in the bucksish spirit - Legion2, Badger and I stayed up until 3am having philosophical discussion about the quality of recent content various visual entertainment delivery systems had displayed.


The Day After

After a much needed recovery rest - and a treasure hunt around my flat for beer bottles from the previous nights festivities - I attended a wedding rehearsal. It was mostly just an excuse to have some nibbles and bubbles in the park but I think a few important ceremonial things were sorted out while I was busy making sure the free dip didn't go to waste.

... The Trade Show Dinner

After my first day of work consisted of hacking my way through a jungle of email to the bottom of my inbox it came as a welcome relief to see that Supervisor Grand Chief K had remembered to invite me along to the VALA trade show this time. She now realises that taking your IT man to an IT focussed event is probably a good idea.

I also had an invite to a dinner put on by our LMS supplier. I agonised for all of one second about skipping gaming night for a free dinner before accepting the invitation.

So yesterday morning, after an interesting meeting with representatives from a printer and PC control company, I was able to take off in the early afternoon to head home and prepare for the impending fun.

Once home I freshened up, donned my trusty excursion bag (see Svetlana, I told you it would be useful once I was back!), gave The Tiger a quick few minutes of stuff-chasing fun, and caught the next train for the big smoke.

I decided to walk from Flinder's street only to discover that the event was not actually at Jeff's Shed but across the river at the convention centre. Upon my eventual arrival I met up with SGCK and Mr Prada and we began the great stuff hunt.
I may be becoming a little blasé but not much of the stuff was that interesting. Most of the pens were flimsy plastic affairs and I already have popping tins and such-forth from Information Online last year. I did pick up a great pen from Civica, and my drawing of a tree earned me a lovely green watch which was far too small for my wrists made rugged from years of keyboard pounding. I was disappointed in the stands that thought a brochure about their product counted as free stuff but what can you do?
I may also have accidentally gained a little first-hand experience about different RFID products along the way.

Our little Bayside triumvirate managed to evade expulsion from the hall and was able to stay for the cocktail reception which was up to the usual beer or wine is a cocktail libraryland standard.
Mr Prada and I tried to find the optimum point in the hall for food tray interception bumping into Madame President and several other of the usual suspects before joining the SPUN friendship circle and heading off to the dinner.

Dinner was at Breezes restaurant in Crown which is a delightful place to relax with dinner except for the hourly huge explosions just outside the window.
The service was of the much appreciated bottomless wine glass style - except for the strange neglect of Sonja Roster Queen's glass which lay barren for the first half hour. I was a little suspicious that they were making fun of me when they produced a double-sized glass for my use for the second half of the evening.
SGCK was flitting around enabling everyone, The Flibberty Gibbet fell off the wagon but was surprisingly well behaved, and I even managed to have a civil conversation with Dubrovnik Hater.
All in all it was a good evening and we left at a reasonable hour as there was nobody with a hotel room and mini-bar to raid.
Fighting off jet-lag on the train I narrowly avoided missing my stop and was home before midnight.


This morning sees me coming into work for my birthday day of work - brightened immeasurably by the presence of Days of our Libraries birthday cake. I also received a wonderful card from Sister Serials - ever the pinnacle of card selection - featuring one dog saying to another:
"I had my own blog for a while, but I decided to go back to just pointless, incessant barking."

... The Rather Sedate Buck's Night of Legion2

Yesterday's big event was the Buck's night for Legion2.
However the day began with a suit fitting for myself so that I will be able to perform my best man duties in style. The effect of all that holiday feasting can be seen in the requirement for me to hire a Large size suit.

The main event began with bowling at the Strike bowling bar in the city. There were many attendees including: BestFriendSincePrep, the rest of the Legion, Badger, Spare Legion, Elfboy, Mr Magpie (no relation), the future brothers-in-law and several of Legion2's friends from work.
BestFriendSincePrep proved the enhancement effect of alcohol by going from last place in the first game to first in the second game after the addition of several performance enhancing elixirs. Some, like ElfBoy, decided that their prime objective was to beat me and didn't mind where they finished otherwise.

After the bowling it was a short, slightly staggering, walk to the evening venue - Mrs Parma's the home of micro brewery beers and hand-crafted parmas.
We were joined by Gavman and Matrixman as we began downing pints and picking our parmas from the menu of ten or so options. The popular choice was the Mexican parma washed down with the red ale.
The venue was wonderfully un-crowded and the noise/music level was low so there was lots of great conversation and witty repartee happening. BestFrienSincePrep attempted to inflict his brand of evil on me again but, since I had to buy my own drinks, he was unable to force his inhuman drinking pace upon my person.
Eventually the venue had the temerity to close at their closing time so we moved on.

I third and final stop for the evening was at the Charles Dickins where we watched an English soccer game or two while continuing to sample fine ales. Eventually just as Legion2 was starting to turn an interesting shade of green we decided to call it a night.

We Legion all hopped onto the next Nightrider bus and headed home. I did my best man duty and roused Legion2 at his stop and walked him to his door before heading home. Hmm, on second thought perhaps my best man duty would have been to let him sleep and wake up in Hurstbridge?


The worst thing I felt today was jetlag which caused me to sleep until mid-afternoon. I just can't shake my Svetlanaland sleeping patterns. I should be able to nap tomorrow at work since there not going to be much for me to do after six weeks away.

Today ended with a family birthdays dinner followed my another session of fixing Freeloading Mum's computer.

Well off to bed now so I'll be fresh as a daisy at work tomorrow.

... Home again, home again, jiggidy-jig!

I've actually been home again a few days now but my time has been consumed with the likes of: unpacking; resting; cleaning up 6 weeks of The Tiger's tumbleweed fluffballs; hanging most of the new blinds that arrived the day before I left; the first gaming since returning; gasping my way through Thursdays soccer game and struggling to get a consistent internet connection as Telstra plays their disconnecting game with me again.

I had no flight problems this time so yay Qantas!
(Unless being wedged against the window for 11 hours by two Germans counts as a flight problem?)

Adjusting to the 25 degree temperature differential is taking a while as well as sunlight after 5pm.

I should be back to more regular blogging now that I'm back - I do have to top last years 99 posts and hit the magic three figures after all.


ps. todays title comes from one of my favourite films which I quickly snapped up the 5 disc version of once I was back