Freeloading Phill and ...

A Conference Caution

Ordinarily a conference located on the Gold Coast would be an occasion for carefree abandon, joyous socialising, bountiful food and drink, and lastly some actual conference stuff.

However one's recent experience has proven to be one rife with moments requiring caution.


It all starts out fine, deciding on what apparel will be appropriate for the tropical-ish clime and planning many a walk or perhaps even a float in the ocean.
However the Caution here is: October may prove to be a stormy time up North and you may find your early arrival provides only stormy weather and hence only a hotel room to be experienced in comfort.

If one does venture out for a walk one rather rapidly discovers the tacky and touristy bent of the location and ends wondering about the usefulness of an early arrival to see the sites.


Of course the ever popular LibraryLand cocktails are a point towards said early arrival. (One does feel there is no need to Caution about the nature of the "cocktails" in question given my multitude of posts bemoaning this terrible bait and switch).


The conference events [proper were got (gotten?, gut?) underway with the traditional bus tour to local libraries. Somehow despite ones best attempts at punctuality one arrived in the foyer to find the bus loaded and the roll call underway. I do, however maintain that I was on time as it took a further 3 minutes to reach my name on the roll call.

The sessions themselves began the next day and one was reminded of one's long neglected need to upgrade one's eyeglasses - having to sit at the front and still squint away at the gigantic screen. Perhaps the projector was not focused correctly?


The first full day ended with a bus trip to dinner at the CUB Brewery. I swear that there was dinner involved, honest.
So the night passed in a blur with highlights including the discovery of a CUB dark beer, a beer pulling competition, the discovery of a secret stash of Fat Yak beer, educating fellow librarians about the "one of each desert" rule, an unstoppable chorus of return bus trip librarians singing wheels on the bus with hearty gusto, and settling in for an innocent post dinner drink.

It was at the post dinner drink that my naive innocence was taken advantage of - and fellow workmate Supervisor S failed in her duty of care to keep one safe. One was talked into the importance of the organisation having a strong executive and the relative lack of effort required of the presidential position. Need I Caution you to pay no heed to late night arm twisting?

So of course at the election the next morning one won. And, take note, one's main talker-into-er was not elected to the committee!!
One smells a conspiracy of the highest order.


With the conference finishing up one was treated to the first glimpse of the benefits of power as a corporate car was used for the luxurious journey to the airport terminus.


In contrast the flight was a rather uncomfortable hot and sticky affair with the aeroplane kept at a sweltering 32 degrees - perhaps to acclimatise us all to the Melbourne weather we were flying back into?

Anyway, after braving the chilly 13 degree tarmac walk one was soon bustled home in a taxi and ready to fall into the long awaited post midnight slumber.

The Tiger, however had other ideas and one was forced to provide a lap for nigh on half an hour before being allowed to retire to one's bed chamber.

Such are the events of an incautious conference experience.
.